Choosing Love

Uncategorized Mar 30, 2013

I celebrated my 24th wedding Anniversary in the most unexpected way...I found some deeply sought after - rather extraordinary – Divine peace of mind and heart. Many of you know that my husband, who has terminal cancer, moved to a new home to care for himself the best way he sees fit. While I would much - much rather he be with me – he isn’t.

We all know that we cannot control the actions of another person; I get that, but healing our emotions when we hurt, without blaming the person - who we think is causing us pain, is a profound task. With the event of my 24th anniversary fast approaching I was facing a turmoil of emotions – just how could this possibly be my personal life? I am a healer and I love my husband – it’s not supposed to be this way! Then in a flash – of course after what seemed to be a hundred hours of prayer over many months – pure understanding came to me! I saw the perspective of God’s relationship with me! How much God is always available to be close to me, but I move away – thinking I can heal myself the best I can and don’t really need any help – I’ll figure it out on my own.

I saw how patient God is to always be just right here with open arms to receive and love me. All of us - that is!!! Even when I don’t feel worthy. A joyful peace came over me and I knew that in that instant of pure understanding that there was a higher lesson happening here! This old chronic emotional pain of mine was not about Daniel at all - it was about my relationship with Divine Source. When do I seek Divine connection? How often to I respond when I hear God calling to spend time with me? I have a habit of sincerely being with God just when I’m in pain and only stay until the edge is taken off. Then I go about my busy life forgetting that I could be holding the hand of the Divine the whole time – every moment! This pure Intelligent Omnipotent Source just IS - always here – regardless if I come or I go. I am a truth-seeker, if anything, and I found some truth of what God’s love looks and feels like. In an instant - all pain and confusion was gone! I knew I am to BE the same God-like-love towards Daniel and towards all life.

I know it will take time for this truth to take root deep within me and grow and bloom in my life – but the door is now open and Divine light is now shinning in this once dark secret place. So when Daniel came to visit for a short while with a dozen roses in his hand – I was so happy to see and love him for as long as I had with him - instead of any hidden feelings of not feeling loved because he cannot give me more. I could tell weight was being lifted off his whole being because of my new genuine level of pure acceptance. I was able to see him how God views me when I show up and say I need some God-Time – unconditional joyful love.

Stay connected with news and updates!

Join our mailing list to receive the latest news and updates from our team.
Don't worry, your information will not be shared.

Subscribe